Sweet, Sweet, Nothings

The Round-up

2006-09-08T22:05:00.000-04:00

9/8
Friday Night memories:
The morning class was cool- I will be trying to win money at current and she seems really cool- I also won the heart of the assistant since I remembered his film from last year

the afternoon equipment was...ok. I really need to figure out how to make a cart thats not too big. I was a goddamn Shirpa today and it's only the first week.

Then off to the Museum of the Moving image: I was really impressed- this place is fantastic and is so relevant to verything everyone in my program is doing. Awesmoe. The coolest thing was the sculpture "Feral Fount" by Gregory Barsamian really amazing and soo inspiring.

Oh but before that I had my haircut at my friends new slaon and it was nice chatting etc..but then she put this goop in my hair and let it curl and I wasnt into it at all and felo like a real greaseball at the museum but after Yoga by the time i got home (now) it look spretty slamming, I confess. Finally a haircut- it's been since February...

So there was Yoga- incredibly full! so annoying, but at least the teacher is back- but for all the new people she tones it down alot and we spent the last 15 minutes laying down.

but since I put a quilt under my mattresss to offset the dip the back is still no good.

Going to a party soon. I hope the beer's cold this time.

Oh, and lest I fail to mantion: I totally farted, out loud, in yoga. it sucked. I still feel wierd thinking about it.

Tiling tommorow and more museums and art.

You know...

2006-08-29T13:21:00.000-04:00

Since my last day of work on friday it has become Insta-Fall. It has been cold and damp and rainy and cloudy and not at all like August but more like february without being tooo cold.

I am trying to get my schedule set in my mind for next semester whcih begins next Tuesday.

I'm very nervous about all this.

On the plus side I met some INsane couple with a clothing business who need a site so I'll have some extra cash soon- which i will put towards a computer or a mattress.

Also I am eating alot of sugar cereal which I bought in bulk at Costco over the weekend. It is a Kellogs trifecta of Fruit loops, Corn Pops and Apple Jacks...hese are all among my top choices fro sugar c ereal and I am enjoying it immensly. Its about time for a nother bowl- with skim milk, of course.

You shoulod have SEEN the banana candle!

2006-08-17T18:01:00.000-04:00

So last weekend I was discussing with some friends (since you are reading anyway) the atrocities that make up the early days of food photography. Now, I used to work for a food photogrpaher and so got to meet lots of interesting people who make thier living as "food Stylists." These people are artist, chefs, modelmakers, sculpters and generally a little wacko too. These guys were super talented and must have had alot to overcome, judging by the history of this artform.

We looked at some old Better Homes and Gardens jellied molds and Uuuuugly presentaions of casserole surprises galore. Now I regret not buying "Cooking with Bananas" which I found in a used cookbook store ( places like that are why I can never actualy leave NYC, no matter how much I complain about it.)

Anyway I happened to come across this site yesterday. It is a tribute to all that is this kind of "art." Not to mention snort-out loud funny commentary on the "styling".

It takes high Art to a new Art- especially with all the sexual undertones and imagined realities. I think I will start collecting these too. You know, for the kids.

mmmm...sweet, sweet Chilled Celery Log....

Delicious!

Lame, whiny Blogger

2006-08-16T18:29:00.000-04:00

I'm trying desperatley to hook myself up with a neeew MacPro book, but damn is that shit xpensive!

I thought about art ideas last night and came up with a list of things to do that I proably will never do. What is that? Where is the motivation I need. How can so much greed and ambition have so little drive.

Sometimes I want to apply to be a shopgirl rather than really getting my portfolio together. Thing is, I work. Work is supposed to make work, but real work- 9-5 kills all cells and leaves a girl drained. with no desire to exert. You'd think that going to the gym everyday would help- but that just makes me mroe tired. Hmm...chronice fatigue or laziness?

Wow- good thing I look good today- cause I feel like shit.

I Thwart, You Thwart, S/he Thwarts, They Foil!

2006-08-10T13:41:00.000-04:00

My work sent this out in refernece to the thwarted terrorism of today:

The Transportation Security Adminstration (TSA) instituted the following measures after
a terror plot in Britian was thwarted:

* Liquids are banned from carry-on luggage and cannot be taken through security

checkpoints. That includes drinks, toothpaste, perfume, shampoo, hair gel, suntan

lotion and similar items. Drinks purchased in the airport cannot be carried onto flights.

* Medications will be allowed but must be presented for inspection at security check-

points.

* Mothers can bring baby formula on board, but only after drinking it in front of security

officials first. (this will indeed catch terroristãs!)

* All shoes must be removed and placed on an X-ray belt for screening

* Pasengers are also asked to arrive at least two hours early to allow for additional

screening.

* Passengers traveling to the United Kingdom should contact their airline for information

about any extra security measures or precautions that might be required. Laptop

computers, mobile phones and IPods are among items banned on British flights.

Can you imagine flying without an ipod?! This Sux...but well done on the thwarting, Britain- Well done!

New year- new postings

2006-08-10T12:53:00.000-04:00

So it's been a full year since I've been here- how time smacks a person around is crazy rude.

My first year of grad school was pretty miserable, but I think I'm getting the hang of it...I have to come up with a thesis project to work on for the next year of my schooling...horrifiying? Yes. Worth it? Prolly not. Sucker for stress and dissapointment? Oh my, yes.

So I've made up for it by having a wicked awesome summer- yeah, for real....

I went to California where I surfed and mountain biked (not fun) and drank wine. I went to rock camp and was in a band for three days. I surfed again.

I go to the Y -EVERY DAY after work...oh yes..I'm not losing lbs., but the ass has shrunk and the legs are tight...now thats Sweet!

General goodness...with a hint of anxiety over what kinds of artistic endeavours I'm not producing as the end of my twenties zooms forward...I can't wait to be 30+ but I just have certain expectations of where I want o be by then..doesnt everyone? especially in NYC where there is so damn much to compare yourself to..ah well...I'm trying to be cool...healthy...not like that....

good things today:

giant puppets!

great rates! seriously- I'm, trying to become as knowledgable as possible about financial shit- too many people get effed by not taking care of themselves correctly...it's true!

That is all.

Shaggy, dry and no cable.

2005-09-02T12:43:00.000-04:00

Roomie finally pulled the plug on the cable...the guy showed up at 9:15 am (you know, because they were supposed to be here between 10 and 2???!!). I was supposed to have him take the internet too...but I couldnt do it. Screw it, I'll pay the bill. i couldn't live without things like :

CATS in the sinK!!!! oh yess please...

The images and news of Katrina and her violent Waves has been terribly depressing. Did people really need to see Bush-man fail at dealing with 'closer to home' devastation and loss of life to figure out what a douchebag he is. Yes. Via Salon:

On Wednesday, the New Hampshire Union Leader, which endorsed Bush in his run for reelection based largely on his response to 9/11, laid into the president hard for responding so slowly to Katrina. "A better leader would have flown straight to the disaster zone and announced the immediate mobilization of every available resource to rescue the stranded, find and bury the dead, and keep the survivors fed, clothed, sheltered and free of disease," the paper said. "The cool, confident, intuitive leadership Bush exhibited in his first term, particularly in the months immediately following Sept. 11, 2001, has vanished. In its place is a diffident detachment unsuitable for the leader of a nation facing war, natural disaster and economic uncertainty."

Christ! NH is so retarded. Good outlet shopping though.

I am in limbo, waiting for stuff to go down. I have no idea what to do with my self- my entire life is different, and I got new furniture so I'm feeling pretty pathetic.

One more thing before I go away for the weekend:
****The one time this weatherman has the nation hanging on to his every word...he FReaks out!

Measles, Mumps Rubella oh my!

2005-09-01T12:19:00.000-04:00

I've been closed out of all my fucking classes. Why am I taking out a loan the size of Sumatra if I am not getting what I want? This will NOT Do. UnAceptable!!!!!

And I had to get a shot.

I need to shave my tounge

2005-08-30T22:51:00.000-04:00

Since I had nowhere to be today I drank about three pints of tequila,among other things, at karaoke last night. I came home a few hours before Skinnard had to go to work and I slept past all daytime programing. It is brutally hot in the apartment and my body is in bad form

I found this site that has some interesting "cures" that I might try next time...cause there's always a next time y'all!

Skips: Eat a bag of skips. The saltiness of them instantly makes you feel muchbetter,and the strong prawn flavour removes that manky taste you always have in your mouth

I think I know what Skips are, and I am sure I know what manky means.

If you like being super hungover, but your headache isn't giving 110%, then read these rules and observations on how to navigate the U.S. Open in Queens.

10th floor, 10th Anniversaries!

2005-08-29T10:42:00.000-04:00

Feel free to celebrate, however appropriately, the 10th anniversaries of:

Tommy Boy~RIP Chris, it is indeed funny to see a "Fat Guy in a Little Jacket". It always will be. I wonder what wonders the special edition DVD holds......
Suck~ Before Heather was a rabbit, and before Ana was the wonky pin-up of political nerdz. Memories are sweet. So are Terry's illustrations. Check out the Filler archives, hi-larious!
Toy Story. It was just a good movie. fer rilla.

10 years ago it was 1995. Man, that was a cool year. THink about it. I think I was also 10 lbs. lighter. 10, 10, 10!

Hello from the 10th Floor

2005-08-29T10:16:00.000-04:00

Duude, I am in my new lab using the departments oh-so-fast wireless connection. I had a weirdly emotional weekend, but I think my brain is sorted out now. Feeling calm.

I just stumbled onto an article in the July Wired re: female orgasm and how the drug companies finally realized that pumping tons of blood into a females genetalia does little for her sexual appetite. Duuuuh. Thats how come Jessica loves Roger Rabbit. He makes her laugh, so take that Dick "pretty boy" Tracy.

I am going to have to explore my new environment to find the appropriate place to use the bathroom when it is urgent...like about now.

On the ikea front; my advice is stick with the P's:

• PAX
• Pöang

Oh babies!

2005-08-24T13:06:00.000-04:00

I am FREE! Instead of being at work, I am at home. The difference is that now I am no longer paid to play snood. Does that mean I am a retired snood professional? I'll have to make a varsity jacket for myself.

Today I will go to Target. At my leisure. the new era or organization begins NOW!

I am enjoying these things as well:

Water art...awesome.
"Good food should be made with alot of love and alot of butter"

have a pretty good day.

2nd to last day at work

2005-08-22T14:40:00.000-04:00

ddddfeeling very good about leaving it all behind- except my sweet computer- I will miss you most of all, G5!

•••vSince all I ate over the weekend was cream and cheese (Mrs. L's is truly, truly, heaven on earth and is priced accordingly) I am back on the greens and other such healthy food stuffs.

I will keep playing snood for the rest of the day in hopes of getting a ridiculously high score. That way my replacement at work will never be able to beat it. I will then experience my word of the day: Schadenfreude (\SHOD-n-froy-duh\, noun: A malicious satisfaction obtained from the misfortunes of others.)

Another image of what I will be leaving behind, alas:
her name is katrina and she is not a man
and they are real. Sam says shouldshoyuld shut up
because she is a really sweet lady. A really sweet
lady that advertises sexual favors in the
back of a newspaper.

i love you all!

How to be my man:

2005-08-18T16:22:00.000-04:00

Since I live in such a sparsely populated town as NYC, I am familiar with every single/married mans woe: When will I see another woman??

I'ts been well-documented that NYC is FULL of available women~ so how can you; a strapping, ageing, unshowered, grade school d, greasy, insensitive, unattractive strange man on the street, get in on some of that hot girlie action?

Well boys aged 18-95, it's your lucky day. I am going to give you some insider tips on how to get into my pants:

Rapping: If you are in your car, walking with headphones on or just hanging out near a music source and some hip-hop is on then PLEASE rap along while waving your arms in
an authoratative way and look at me while doing all this so I know it is meant for me. I get extra impressed when the song is about killing.
Being Drunk in a Subway: Hopefully I will be very sweatyt and carrying
two oversized heavy bags and limping. And hopefully you will be with some buddies. You all should feel free to stare at me and ask me "what's goin' on?". I have no where to go, and am happy to stand and talk to you. I will most likely ask for your phone numer to have sex with you later that night.

I will be adding soon, but these two are gems~until next time boys.
xoxo

Chieee-rist!

2005-08-17T15:54:00.000-04:00

Today I have learned 2 more things I don't want to know about The Donald.

#1: He officially has the worst haircut ever.
#2: He thinks he can teach us all a thing or two. When did he become an authority
on anything other than Dominos pizza? I guess America's iron is hot, and needs a striking.

Summer Update Y'all

2005-08-17T11:11:00.000-04:00

This summer has been a series of X-treme highs and lows.
Highs:

3 days in Cape Cod at a private house on the beach.
Watching a lightning storm over the ocean from that house.
Drinking and singing for free every Monday night
bought 2 dresses that i Loooove ($10 each)
couple of really good beach trips.
I've been eating like a queen thanks to my personal chef.

Lows:

VENGEFUL return of Migrane that lasted two and a half weeks in June,
landing me in the ER one and a half times.
RELENTLESS humidity and heat mixed with the already unsavory feel and smell of the city. (I do not have AC)
INEVITABLE re-gain of the five lbs I lost before May.
and most recently the: UNFORTUNATE spill that has had me in bandages and limping for a week. I will probably lose my toenail. The idea of this makes my stomach quiver.

That's the update.

I have 4 days of work left (including today)..this is perhaps the greatest news I have had since I got the job.

My job here is done in all senses. When I started here X & Xtine were both miserable, depressed, lonely, and sexless. I leave them both medicated (they go to my Dr. for Rx's),and in relationships (X is moving in with his hippy lady and Xtine just became exclusive with her chef-man).

There are only the three of us in office and we all have our various medical needs. I sent them both to my psychiatrist and they both went. I take Wellbutrin™, X takes Celexa™, and Xtine takes Paxil™. I think the doc looks like a turttle on account of his neck to head proportions/positioning, so now we all take time out of our days once a month to go 'see the turttle'. Tom Cruise can say what he wants- but this office is far better off on drugs.

What else? I have learned that although I enjoy poker very much I really don't play very well. I have learned this by losing a huge amount of money over the last six months. Money I should have used on an airconditioner. Whatevs.

Anyways- its only one more week of editing porn like this little gem:

No more "Snow pups" no more "anal ladies" no more "very accommodating and mature" no more "'Greek' Goddess" no more " toilet and dildo training"...the list in endless and my vocabulary greatly expanded. Also my notions of sexuality has been greatly affected. I'm glad to get out.

Anyways I might be buying a great laptop for cheap from my boss and I've got some good plans the next few weeks and possibly some good drugs to with...things are looking up.

Fuzzy Tuesday

2005-05-24T12:00:00.000-04:00

I have been to Florida and am now back in the shitty. It is good to be back but I think we could use some palm trees and bodies of water that is turquoise instead of grey. Last night I went to NA with hopes of hanging out with Nicole Ritchie. She wasn't there- or I didn't get in the VIP room- but we had fun with the two hours of free Jack Daniels. We looked good and felt good and had a pretty wild Monday night.

• I am an official cater-waiter and at a Bar Mizvah last Saturday I got recruited to another company. So I'll be making good money and the work is mindless and keeps me busy- and entertained. If you've never been to a rich kids bar mizvah in the west 80's I recommend it: there were dancers and a baseball theme and I walked out with a cap, glove and a couple balls as well as a gorgeous bunch of spring flowers.

••I am seriously going to start a t-shirt biz. Why can't I profit from idiots who want to wear clever sayings?

••I took a class at the learning annex: How to Start Your own business..And it wasn't great- the guy is kind of weird and kept telling anecdotes about him and his wife- but he wasn't wearing a ring and I didn't believe he was the husband type.

••feeling hungover and can't focus my eyes.

NYC Spring is like getting an enema by a gang of bored bullies

2005-05-06T13:03:00.000-04:00

FUCK YOU S.!
Ok- this week all I've learned is that when you tell the truth- you get fucked. When you work really hard and do a good job, no one notices and they turn around and screw you over. Seriously This week has been as fun as getting a septum ring yanked out by a gang lord who wants his money back. FUCK!
Not only have I been working three other jobs apart from my FULL time job~ every time I turn around I am getting told off. I went for an interview and was told my work was too low end and that no one would hire me if I was going to school in the fall- WHY did I tell the truth about that? Something else bad happened because of the truth that I don't remember...
Then last night at my first cater waiter gig I was the only one who had any innitiative or experience and was working as hard as I could doing a good job and then today I get a call from the office yelling at me because S. said I was bothering him about whether we get to eat or not. I asked if we got dinner. HOw is that bugging? I didn't ask twice, and at our training we were told they HAVE to feed us. Now thats TWO weeks in a row I've had trouble with the office and I've only worked five hours for these douchebags. I hate that asshole- he didn't even stay until the end and made the sous chef sign us out. Fat-ass-loser-dickbreath. Goddamn it- I want to break someones face. I'm going on vacation-I'm going on vacation-I'm going on vacation-Im going on vacation-I'm going on vacation.
I'll be snorkeling and driving in the sun wearing open toed sandals and short skirts. I was gonna get a bikini wax but I don't think I can take the abuse right now.
FUCK I hate this city. Everytime I start feeling good about something I get reminded that everyone here thinks I am shit and I will never get anything worthwhile out of being here. Most overrated place in the world.

Things I WANT. Part I (of an endless, greedy series)

2005-04-21T15:47:00.000-04:00

Well, since I will be going to school soon, and trying new things (like wearing a tux, if I ever get a catering job) I would like to remind myself of the small (yet out of my price-range) luxuries that would enrich my life could I afford them. This is what we're working for people! ( and of course a sense of fulfillment, and helping others and world peace.)
I'm sorry, but I want the following:

so sad

2005-04-21T15:44:00.000-04:00

biomedics
Originally uploaded by mamma.

My first item is "Contact lenses" These are on sale at 1800contacts.com but its still over a hundred bucks. I would really like to trade in these specks for the cool aviator shades I have. I wait.

Around the HOuse things:

2005-04-21T15:42:00.000-04:00

Sealybed
Originally uploaded by mamma.

Yup- Someday I will have an official BED.
This one is calld
"Sealy Posturepedic Lancome Pillow Top Mattress" and the damn Price range: $1,099.00 - $1099.00

I sleep on the same lump futon that's been breaking my back now for four years.

ArtisanMixer

2005-04-21T15:37:00.000-04:00

ArtisanMixer
Originally uploaded by mamma.

HOw much of an asshole am I? Well, for starters I have this big red lucious mixer in my kitchen- and I use it to make fresh cakes, and cookies–everyday!

Bike+Cat=2 Birds

2005-04-21T15:32:00.000-04:00

bike:cat
Originally uploaded by mamma.

The following section deals with my desire to exercise- but in the funnest(what?) way possible. THis bike is on Craigslist for $100 and has a really nice rear-basket situation. The cat does not come with it, but a cat is still on my list of "I WANTS". One day when I'm in chrge I'll have a kitten, goddamn it.

Jumping the ropes

2005-04-21T15:29:00.000-04:00

jumprope
Originally uploaded by mamma.

It's so simple- and every thing I read/watch about exercise says its the best- I don't really know where I could do this in my apartment or in front of my building?

So what?

2005-04-21T15:25:00.000-04:00

resist_ball_01
Originally uploaded by mamma.

Yeah, so I want one, who cares? I want one real bad but it is impossible to justify $30 for a fucking ball (still want one.)

Le Sportsac RULES!

2005-04-21T15:23:00.000-04:00

ls.HOT!
Originally uploaded by mamma.

Oh man, these patterns and styles reduce me into a complete retard. Suddenly the only words I know are "so awesome" and "hot". Basically I tun into Ms. Hilton.
THis little number is called a 'Large Studio' handbag. It's so gorgeous and utilitarian I ca-

Sportsac blue/brown

2005-04-21T15:18:00.000-04:00

ls.blue hot
Originally uploaded by mamma.

Damn! I love these colors together- its nice when other people do too.

Sportsac-dots

2005-04-21T15:17:00.000-04:00

ls.dots
Originally uploaded by mamma.

How enticing is this- it's one part Minnie mouse, one part upper east side grandma and one part juniors section at Macy's, and one part eighties-romance-movie. It's got a hold on me.

sportsac flowers

2005-04-21T15:05:00.000-04:00

ls.flwrs
Originally uploaded by mamma.

I can see myself using this for school-and feeling a little legally blonde about it.

Annie is a cute woman!

2005-04-15T14:47:00.000-04:00

•••I can't beleive I saw Annie last night! It was really great and I felt cool to be on "the list". The place was PACKED! and we were ttrying to get upfront to dance- but no one was moving and no one was dancing- pretty lame. But we got there early for free drinks and I got to enjoy a pretty place like the Tribeca Grand for free. Annie sounded great, although a little quiet and shoegazer-y, and it was generally a perfect evening- including the expensive steak I had at The Spotted Pig (which was o.k, but I've eated waaay better for waaay less hooplah and money) Fantastic espresso. My credit card is now banished back into a drawer, and out of my wallet.
I think I might pass on the Misshapes party Annie is spinning at now, since I saw her play. The place will probably be mobbed.

••I know a guy who plays music with a cool band. Way back in the day he sported a custom made belt buckle a la ghetto fab, and it looked pretty cool- especially 'cause he is a skinny, pale while guy. The Scroling Belt Buckle is the next step for aspiring trendmakers- or aspiring assholes who want to seal the deal. Now all that needs to happen is for Lindsay Lohan to wear one that reads "Hey, stop looking at my crotch".
Q: Is this buckle compatible with the standard buckle belt?

A:"Yes. We don’t sell actual belts, but you can probably use any existing buckle-style belt you have. Or get one at, like, any store."

Any store? Ooh. I ,like, totally, er, get it.

•••Tonight- maybe I'll skip out on the birthday party at Capone's that I'm organizing and head over to the secret Beck show. Arent secret shows supposed to be free? Why is it a whopping $25? That's like my lunch budget for the week yo!

THIS WEEKS MONEY SAVES:
••Free Annie Show at the Tribeca grand.
••2 Free vodka cranberries (thats a cape coddah to you) at Tribeca Grand
••Awesome sweater with small hole-$11-patched up in 5 minutes. $8 hot tank top.
••$7 high heels.
••Free shipping of Nubbins gift.
••Free spa and facial treatment tommorow- old gift certificate from boss.

not bad.
oh, and I got a PT job.

2005-The year that

2005-04-13T17:06:00.000-04:00

•Britney proves she has unprotected sex with her 'husband' ( I don't think he knows about birth control- this will be his 3rd child in 3 years!!)
•The pope died
•Las Vegas Turns 100!
•I got into grad school and my sister finishes college

And It's only April!
So much to do.
Why don't I do 100 lunges a day?

I might have to buy a tux!

2005-04-12T11:41:00.000-04:00

This week- a birthday looms..A woman plans...
I interviewed with a catering company- and it went well- but more importantly it allowed me to be in the union square area and led me to have the most amazing falafel sandwich I have ever had (EVER). SO whomever is on the corner of University and 12th st. You MUST go to that little pita place- you will not regret this advice. Maybe you will, I don't care.
I watched one too many Law & Order episodes last night and I had a scary dream about mobsters and scandals and guns.
The pimple fairy visited me twice last night.
I'm afraid my new medication regime is not entirely agreeing with me yet- I felt like my forehead and stomach were on a similar wavelength of pain and destruction yesterday neither one willing to give up .
I am so tired today.

••Gwen Stefani says "people don't get that I'm really a big geek" she is naively wrong. We get it, its obvious. You just happen to have good art directors and stylists and great genes.
I wonder what she does for fun? push-ups? writes in her diary? writes in her dumb blog? counts her money? adds extra facets to her diamonds?

Safety

2005-04-08T13:41:00.000-04:00

Lifehacker is an amazing idea for a web site- its almost too obvious . Why hasn't anyone done this well before? My goal in life is for maximum efficiency. Hold on, not in the way that I have a blackberry glued to my hand and talk fifty words a second and train starbucks employees. But there is a deeper goal of being inbothered because everything is done. In jobs I do it well- not so in life. But lately I have been given the chance to change a lot about how I live my life (read: medication).

Once I worked in a terrible restaurant that is now closed forever {YES!}. Orlando (say it like Jerry Blank), the able busser/runner/waiter/expediter was a busy guy. This guy would bust his hump all the time, for a boss who was psychotic and we just didn't know why he was always so anal. When asked why, Orlando said "I'm lazy, and I want to be left alone. If I do things better and faster, then I can be left alone that much sooner."
Ok, so the quote is not verbatim, but I always remembered the gist- and I admired him. I was enlightened. My inherent laziness has been a problem all my life- but here was a way to get things accomplished, while psychologically appeasing my natural tendencies.

Point is: I love the fastest, smartest, most informed and thought out way to everything- in my head I am a real neurotic about it. I don't lose my mind anymore, and have been able to channel it into good. Life hacking is basically what I love to do: figure out a way to maximize my leisure time. Everything from going to the grocery to saving money, to traveling. It all boils down to selfish fucking-around time. I love to sit and fuck-around at nothing, just read this entry.

Anyway I already wrote in a couple tips and will try my best to not write them again unless it's super super necessary- otherwise I can see myself on a blocked list

•In other news, I have 6 books about it and cannot make a decent site.
•I played poker at work yesterday and won 25 dollars.

Too Lazy to post

2005-04-06T17:05:00.000-04:00

This Daylight savings hour has changed my life! I've been diagnosed with gerbilia and my hair is growing back into my head. I love spring!

I've made it a recent mission to nose my way into my youngest sisters life. I've taken the stance that she can't talk to our parents because It is, like, so frustrating, so she should talk about stuff with. I then tell my parents that she is fine and does not need to go to a special school. Unless she wants to. She's not even a sophomore yet but I'll have her into college, early decision 2007. (her graduation date is '08) Yoawza!

••They were all right-my new Adidas®deodorant is proving its worth in dry underarms! And its aluminum-free. I haven't been this interested in roll-ons since Secret Platinum® made the waves seven years ago.

••My new meds make me yawn every five minutes- Is this pre-stroke behavior? Why can't I understand how to do what I want on the web-site I am making...its so frustrating- do I use HTML, or flash, or both, and if both, then how ? And in what capacity? Really, now. Shouldn't I know by now? I'm going to spend some time on 'style gala' trying to find some answers

••PS-It must be pretty bad to catch the ebola virus on your birthday and throw up all over your financial firm offices.

New season..breaking through...ungh

2005-03-31T18:04:00.000-05:00

So today I got a C + so to speak, on my ADD test. Meaning: on a scale of 0 (no ADD) to 10 (ten year old boy on pixie sticks and soda) I came out as a perfect 5, on every test. This means I am not that challenged, but I am not in the clear either- Dr. laughed at me a little when I couldn't remember the question about how often I forget to pay attention. yeah, haha. Whatever, I guess I feel pretty good about myself- hes not giving me Ritalin, just upping the Wellbutrin-so I wont need to be on 3 different meds...Good times with ritalin in college.... things are always better when they're not actually meant for you.

Some Songs I wish I wrote:

Riannon
Chain of Fire
You were right (built to spill)
Oh, Darlin
Vacation (go-gos)
All Apologies
She's like a Rainbow
Heart of glass
Hang on to your ego

I like my new office space, but I think we might be moving again...we'll see. I don't see why I can't get a 10k raise. Technically it is fair.

My fingers still hurt from playing intense guitar scales for six hours five days ago.

: The world is full of more than I will ever understand. (I feel bad for the DVD cover designer)
ps.
The braindead girl died today despite the lord's soldiers attempts to stick tubes back in. Yesterday I found her blog.

frizzzzz

2005-03-29T22:29:00.000-05:00

last weekend I went on another bender and friday blended into saturday afternoon too easily.

I did manage to go to N.Sixth for shows and was happy I did.

I also managed to get my ass in gear for the free WELLA studio haircut. Being a hair model sounds glamorous, but the girl took off the front parts of my long hair and now I have a shag/mullet. Makes me wish my hairdryer was this!

Anyways, I just had my first shower with the damn new hairdo and I am still unhappy about it- I had just gotten my hair at a nice place- and then someone mentioned FREE and I leap!. From now on I'm only letting Aveda students cut my hair. Those people are geniuses.

Also, I went running for a solid half hour and it is colder than I thought. But it was still pretty nice. I ran around the outside of the track at the park and didn't get attacked or run over!

Work sucks purple balls this week. can't wait for it to be over~however I have been making alot of nice color designs lately so hopefully they will be enjoyed by clients too.

Today I saved on toothpaste AND conditioner by using my Duane Reade Dollar Rewards Club Membership Card...you should get one too they have sales all the time.

I wonder what happened to:

Nelly Furtado~The little bird ruled the airwaves then dissapeared.
Rene Russo~the (crappy, I hear) sequel to her big movie is out and no one's mentioned her name at all! Does everyone think it was Uma in Get Shorty?

All I came up with is that Rene is alive, and Nelly has been making albums secretly, and hasnt abandoned the raggae ways she was leaning towards...oh who the hell cares.

Copacetic

2005-03-24T23:09:00.001-05:00

I think my word of the day is kind of my horoscope. Today was copacetic, and a lot of tensions had worked themselves out by the end of the day.
My dad came through BIG TIME for me today with some tax relief. I am feeling so damn glad about it- I can finally exhale for the first time since January. He's come through a couple times like this, when it really counts, thank jebus. I hate being as old as I am and having to ask him for money, when mostly all I want is to raise enough money to help my mom have a copacetic day for the first time in like ten years. Soon, soon....

••So now, with new freedom, I have been going over possible course schedules, internship opps, gym discounts, student clubs and organizations, etc...I have never been so excited about school before. They won't know what hit them. I'm feeling like winning every scholarship, making deans list and winning awards every few weeks...Inevitably, this will all bring me down come the fall when I have a breakdown and re-think this whole snafu...but until then YAY!

•I will try to convince Trollbäck & Co. to take me on as an intern over next summer- I'm not sure if they take interns but, like I said, I'm feeling ambitious, dammit.

•I got a new idea for Nubbin's festivities, but since he's so nosy I can't talk openly on my own damn blog- I guess I'll write about it on the one he doesn't know about-HA
I will say there will be some savory things added to the usual avalanche of sweetness I provide.

•I watched the American Office tonight- WTF? It's just re-enacting the original with American accents and "Hillary Rodham Clinton" instead of "Camilla Parker Bowles." It was CRAP. None of the originals tension, discomfort or realness came through. It was indeed like a dumbass BK commercial with that guy from E's 'soup'.{ C- }I ended up kind of enjoying Fox's "Life on a Stick" not the funniest stuff but the potential is definitely there- and it seemed enforced which should earn it an Emmy right away comparatively. (bitchy and self-righteous about TV am I!)
•Typing 'righteous', feels pretty righteous..

•I have to work on designing a web site for a friend- so I'm trying to do something that will force me into HTML depths I've avoided until now.

•LOG: Pretty woman X2, various Shiffer's- My ass is still enormous- what the hell!
things have to shape up man.

• Oh, and I sent out a mass e-mail, whoring myself out for extra work, to everyone I know. G-kins is insistent on the voiceover career option. I'm so totally tempted- how hard can it be?

"showing off doesn't seem to be a real job, does it?"

2005-03-21T16:10:00.000-05:00

•I have heard alot about the American version of 'The Office' and people are saying it's going to be good. Who are these people in the know ?
The NYT has an article on Ricky Gervais and his work on a new show called "extras"
I hope the American Office isn't just a long drawn out version of those Burger King commercials: Co-workers ordering lunch and acting snarky around office supplies.

Peppered with coldplay and Dave Mathews

2005-03-21T13:51:00.000-05:00

The poisoning was on a full roll this weekend and I had a great time singing, dancing, eating, drinking and going home after the sun came up. I still have a rasp in my voice from screaming out loud Saturday night to the musaak beats of a sub-standard karaoke machine.
Since none of birthday girls cheapo friends brought her anything nice we made sure she left with a bouquet of ballons stolen from a neighboring birthday party. I think she liked that.

I've never been too crazy about Blackjack, because it happens so quickly, but I'm afraid this article tempts me like crazy. like really CRAZY!

Colleague is playing a medly of songs I had my fill of ten years ago: walking in memphis, the wrong way (sublime), Mercedes Benz (Janis) etc.... It's pretty annoying.

Possible lead on practice space + drummer + another voice +bass/guitar = hmmmm?

I'm a hunger.

Hey there, Fancy Pants

2005-03-19T00:53:00.000-05:00

So Nubbin came over and helped me with finances some more and I feel so much better. I will stick to my shiny new BUDGET (quicken like chicken)!

Also, the Motley Fool directed me to a site that lets me check my credit reports and get my credit score...it cost some money, but I will get updates on my status and since a loan will be asked for later this year I need to know where I stand- and the results werent bad like I thought they would be.
This is the beginning of my first fiscally reponsible year! I've even budgeted for gambling.This is all in hte positive new directon of my future- that is actually thinking I might have one was a major step.
So the next 4 years are very important and will be filled with maturing, enlightening experiences.
- I guess in between all the growth I'll throw in few benders, late nights and poison.

Sweet, sweet, poison......

Speak Up!

2005-03-18T16:23:00.000-05:00

Thanks for the comment! I don't want to get dooced, so I can't tell you where I work. All I know is everyone is trying to look very busy and important around here so prove their worth- So I've been thinking up band names like crazy:

More potential band names:

Moira and the Music
The Exec.s
My Holy War
The Due Dates
Pitted Dates
Paste Taste

The Go Team!

2005-03-18T13:49:00.000-05:00

I read about them in today's Metro, and then it seemed as though they were on everyones (blogs) playlists. So What the hell- I Limewired their album it's pretty cool ! Not since the Avalances has sampling been so much fun. Main difference is that the girl sings over it and she sounds awesome. The website is nice with good photos of them having fun. They are playing in the city next week- maybe I can get in for free..thats right, I know people..

More band names I thought of:

The Sweet Seeds
The Bruised Ego's or
The Bruisers
The Cabal

Two more people got laid off since the morning.

Via Spamusement

2005-03-18T12:26:00.000-05:00

I havn't visited the site for a while and todays edition reminded me how awesome it is!

Plus I got a new Annie song today and it's soo good. It's called Helpless for Love. I will just get the album soon.

Via UMC

2005-03-18T12:09:00.000-05:00

I really wish there was an appropriate way to type out me laughing and snickering withought resorting to 'lol'

It is soooo gay

What was I saying?

2005-03-18T11:37:00.000-05:00

Set up Quicken last night- no more pecuniary problems for me! thats what I thought anyway until I opened up the latest keyspan and coned bill- totaling $212 how is it possible to use that much electricity?! I'm so glad I won't have to pay it after this month.
It's mostly the roomate:
•Plugs in amp for hours at a time
•Leaves lights on through the night and during the day
•Leaves DVD player on
•Leaves cable on

I was unable to brush my teeth today because the bathroom was being used for horrible noises.

•About today:
≈I am wearing the tight jeans for the first time outside of the house. Nubbin, don't get upset.
≈A couple people at work got laid off. I really have to start getting some call-backs.
≈Listening to LCD soundsystem- pretty fun
≈Will try to plan out the next weeks meals by being VERY organized and scientific.
≈I have to have $8 last me until friday.

TMN has a cooll link to a list of bands that reference other bands: a practice I endorse.

Last night I dreamt that I was part of J.Lo's staff and we were heading to some media blitz thing in a mall. On the way we ran into Howard Stern and the two hugged. He looked like Howard Stern, including the height, but was dressed like Woody Allen- he was wearing a button down tucked into khakis and had a short haircut and glasses and a young girl in tow.

while all of us now were walking to the event, JK shows up and hugs Howard Stern and I thought ' I guess it was all for show'. Then it's a blur except for at one point JK. dropped to the floor ( in the exact way that Rebecca from Top Model did; loud head crack on the floor) He was really out and I remember calling EMS, and them saying it didn't look good. I went throuhg his cell phone to find someone to alert, but everyone said he was a notorious liar and very evasive about his personal life so the numbers there wouldnt be real- I called the number for "Mamma Money" and got an angry lady...I don't remember what happened after that.

In a couple weeks I will have a test at my psychiatrist's for ADD- i took a mini test yesterday with him and I din't get a perfect score- in fact I missed the same question twice!
I'm supposed to be thinking about how this might have played out during my life an di am realizing I have been far less that focused as far back as I can remember. Oh well. I guess all that pot in college just made everything worse.

I think I'll be a cater waiter after all.

2005-03-16T12:53:00.000-05:00

••Today at the Office:
*Men's Toilet receives an electrical fire dropping from the ceiling above it. Have you ever seen a melted toilet seat? I have!
* My offices are moving into another section of the floor- we are now going to be overrun with TWO men for men publications. The gays will be getting some good real estate, but we'll still have decent light- I think.

••Other than that I am enjoying:

Neil Patrick Harris the wait is over!
French women DO get fat.
interview with Harold McGee reprinted here (as well as lots of good food links)

••Oh I saw Steve Martin at the Armory show- best sighting ever!

Can't trust that day

2005-03-14T15:14:00.000-05:00

Now that Ballys won't have me anymore, unless I give them money that is, I am left to my own lack of motivation for exercise. I bought a book the other day- but I think I really want the new Billy Blanks Bootcamp videos! I really want to be tight for Florida- and the summer time- and the rest of my soft life. I finally got a chance to work at a restaurant on the weekends- I have to check them out thoroughly in Zagats first. There go my weekends- but It's kind of the right time- I'm completely busted broke. I have to start hustling something. Might as well be food.
•••NEW: I have a new idol. She won the Food network wedding cake thing- and she makes some cool-ass cakes. She went to Pratt and worked designing for Tiffany's- pretty cool. Work is lame- I'm gonna try to look up ways to understand statistics- my new poker book is really hard.
•••Because of a friend of a friend I get Bust Magazine dropped in my cubicle every month when I least expect it. This is a wired magazine for grrrls and crafterbunnies. It's not all embarrassing, but mostly , it is. BUT Amy Sedaris is on the cover and there are some lovely photos. Also, it directed me to this interesting phenomenon. I agree theoretically and ecologically, but I just don't know. Maybe somethings were meant to be disposable.
•Savannah....

The Hat!

2005-03-11T15:13:00.000-05:00

El Sombrero for din-din- and margaritas is ON! Some people are FULL of great ideas.

Busted from behind

2005-03-11T14:56:00.000-05:00

•••Well, I've broken my butt. I think its my hamstring, but it's very close to my ass and it kills!
So I guess its good that my Bally's days are over. I should have taken them up on their offer, but I can't sign a 3 year contract for anything.
I'm looking forward to a rager this evening- and will try not to injure myself further.
It's pretty busy at work today, but I made an ad that I like so I feel pretty good about that.
My new poker book already has my head spinning about odds and fractions- I feel very stupid, but am determined. In fact, I'm thinking about having the boys over next saturday for a tourney.
••Oh I got my girls scout cookies from the adorable Gabrielle. 2 boxes of Samoas? Why yessss.
••I also have a reason to research Savannah GA, for living situations. I'll need some time on the internet.

Thanks Nubbin!

2005-03-10T16:56:00.000-05:00

100 !

Sexy Ray-Ray

2005-03-10T16:43:00.000-05:00

•••Oh mY! Rachel Ray has a sexuality? Too weird.....yet...

••New 50's are pink..check out the interactive on the right. Still not as nice as other countries' money.

• Boing Boing and The times wrote about Wil Wheatons blog, and Kottke picked it up and loads of others are going to the site. It's supposed to be an online weblong of an actor named Wil Wheaton, who was once so awesomely adorable as a kid that he made me cry every damn time I watch that movie, but I never saw him on Star Trek.

Further or Farther??

2005-03-10T14:42:00.000-05:00

••I was waiting in my psychiatrists office and was delighted they had a brand new magazine! I looked through the fresh edition of New York Magazine and it was cool. But there was a chart that reminded me of someone else's charts so I bravely wrote her a letter of warning. Here is that letter, reprinted with my permission:

What's up Rabbit?
LTR, 2nd time e-mailer. The first time was a couple years ago when you had some sort of contest and I knew the answer so I e-mailed you about it.
Anyways, this month's New York Magazine has a page about the "approval matrix" (pg.154, it's unfortunately not online).
The 'Approval Matrix' is a four quadrant chart detailing some current trends as they fall into the categories of what we 'approve' and 'disapprove' in relation to what is 'highbrow' and what is 'lowbrow'. Maybe they have an old reader of yours at the helm, but didn't you pioneer that chart like, forever ago?! Back in the days where there was still a tiny little penis, before there was a 'Rabbitblog' or a 'Wonkette'? Those fools think they are so clever!

I guess the purpose of the letter is just to give you a heads up that someone is biting your steez and to say I'm glad Filler's still online- it's good fun being able to go back and re-read those gems.
Also, I'm sorry about giving you another damn magazine to read.
truly yours,
Sweetykins

Doesn't sound too gay does it? I mean lame, not homosexual.

••ANTM was a dooooozie last night! Brita (my number one pick for the win) was the first to go!!! While Nubbin thought that would mean the end of my dedication to this cycle, nothing could be further from the truth. This upset has renewed my faith in the show, and reminded me that in ANTM, just as in life, anything is possible!. Thanks Tyra. (Tyra is getting a bit full of herself on this cycle- which will be interesting as the competition remains lukewarm)
I'm leaning towards the one who looks like Carmen Kass or the hipster/edgy-girl from two years ago.

••So I took the first step. I admitted I have a problem. I keep losing at poker. Yesterday I bought a book. Today I will fashion a cover for it out of a paper bag, á la middle school, so I can read it on the subway without the rolling-eyed superiority and disdain that hangs in the L train (usually being rolled out by me, so I know it's there).

••I wish I had a flask- Maybe for the summer time I will get one. If you search for 'flask' in MightyGoods they have the best. I especially like the small one you can attach to you KEY CHAIN! Finally a company that understands my needs.

••Also I will try to figure out enough HTML to post a list of all things I cannot buy. This will prolong the pinning, enhance the emptiness and perpetuate the self-pity. I know!

••Boy today's entry sounds pretty bad. I think I'll have some coffee. I wish I heard back from grad schools already. jeez. I'm actually in a pretty good mood.

Will work for money

2005-03-09T16:36:00.000-05:00

OMG! I just did my taxes. Even though I barely scrape by (read: go into more debt every month) they want MORE! lots more. I am glad someone brought a brick of fudge into the office today. I'm gonna need it.

FU craigslist, hotjobs, dice, mediabistro, monster, AND careerbuilder!

2005-03-09T14:43:00.000-05:00

••I've been applying for new jobs all afternoon. I guess my technique sux cause I never get a single response. Never. Not a good response in 4 years. I did get some good tips about interviewing- but I don't ever get that far.

• I really like this new Sony® phone. The screen says it's playing "The Mops" Late July, Working Hours. I Googled the band and came up with the first psychadelic Japanese band. But they only had one album and it wasn't called Working Hours. There is a song by them on that Nuggets box set. You know the one.

•Also my mom wanted me and my sisters to be on the family version of The Amazing Race® but I am not ready for that kind of stress. But we would all like to travel around the world. I just don't want the world to see me doing stupid shit and looking ugly and fat. Sorry mom, we'll get rich another way- I'm bound to find that big bag of money soon. And we'll keep it!

•••I'm going to have to fly through the gym tonight so I can make it honme in time for Suze Orman's PBS special, because I'm young, broke and shlumpy. Oh crap! ANTM (go Brita!) is also on at 8!. I guess I'll have to buy Suze's damn book.

••for all the ass blasting ( by this I mean 'working out' ) I am still to grande for a certain dress. once i no longer strench the sides of that thing I will have made it! then I'll have to keep it like that and I can't even think about how that really blows.

The Name Game

2005-03-08T12:19:00.000-05:00

Whether or not I ever am in another band again, I am always trying out band names in my head. Lots of people do it too. I want to start writing them down since my memory fails and fails.

•Off Color
•Harriet
•Globo-Chem
•The Majorettes (this sounds like it already exists)
•The Ads
•Used books
•The Cues (this will be my tribute to Jeanette Lee)
•Tiny hands..ooh I like Tiny:

tiny time
tinyville
tiny moons
The tiny wonders or just 'tiny wonder'
tiny times

Is it raining or snowing? What the HELL!

2005-03-08T11:21:00.000-05:00

•Well, I had been wondering what the Karate kid had to say about Hillary Swank. Ralphie doesn't look so hot.
Since I'm on the Post, I thought Grubman was BFF with Tara Reid:
On Lindsay Lohan:

"She's so played. Who does she think she is? She's going out every night of the week ... I mean the girl is like Tara Reid."

Why does the world want to keep looking at this obnoxious, idiot anyway. I'd like one good reason she should have a reality show. Things are getting out of hand.
Also, socialites playing DodgeBall? How completely charming! How plebeian! When will this kind of crap end!
•Are we in a Golden Age of Fugdom? Salon thinks so, and I agree. Maybe there is revolution of ugly going on.
• Martin Denny, pioneer of tiki exotica music died. You know- the stuff that goes along with rockabilly culture like pulp drawings of half-naked ladies and lots of bamboo and grass skirts. In small doses, it's a change from the ordinary. An amateur reviewer at Amazon says this about the music:

The music is not of Hawaii or Polynesia or any other "real" culture, but a complete commercial fabrication, the world of the tiki lodge and resort Hawaii. It brings the guilty pleasures of a Hawaiian vacation into your living room, soothes the spirit, and lets the mind drift away. A must for summer nights on the deck.

I admit that on a grey, rainy and snowy day some xylophone plinks and bird calls sound pretty good. R.I.P Denny. Where the hell is my Mai-tai?!

•••Feeling better. Will try to go swimming tonight. I oonly have a few more days of free gym membership. I still have some lbs. to lose. I missed Fat Actress last night but I don't really mind. Today I will finish my taxes and look for a better job online. Goddamn I need a better job. I do have a window though. Windows don't pay the damn rent y'all.

Po-mo-pets & ho's

2005-03-07T12:33:00.000-05:00

I really want a kitten, but other people's damn allergies are standing in my way. I went to Petland over the weekend, and was so desperate I actually cooed over some tiger fish. Once I bought some Neon Tetras from WalMArt when I was in college. I bought 4 and they fought and ate each other until there was only one asshole left. I 'gave' him to my mom and he lived for another 5 damn years! I'm hesitant to go through that again, but I really want a pet. Even though I am a little nauseated by this site's title, they have really nice things. I kind of like the BIOrb Aquarium and the Racetrack bowl the best.

••Most influencial/powerful women in America. Condi tops the list, but I could never do anything on her orders. If Oprah asked,I would probably join the army. Good thing she's lower on the list.

•I don't see why I can't be a pastry chef AND a rock star. Then they'd all listen.

Pope wins

2005-03-07T11:30:00.000-05:00

So I just heard the editor of the New York Press has been given the order of a 2 week, non-paid suspension. Insulted by the offer, he's chosen to leave altogether. So-long Mr.Koyen, good luck! I guess people are really serious about making sure no one makes unfunny jokes about the pope dying. I hope from now on people only run top-shelf material. In case you missed the hoop-la.

It's a television reference!

2005-03-04T16:20:00.000-05:00

When I was younger I had very daring fashion sense, if I do say so. I mixed prints, wore fishnets under black shorts, wore Doc martens with dresses etc... I know! Outrageous behavior! Sooo rebellious! Sooo original!
Fine, so I wasn't that trendsetting, but I did like to spice things up a bit.
Now, the most adventurous I look is when I wear a fraying old gold belt that is not so gold anymore.
One of the resons I've become a clothes bore is because what used to be interesting and cool, is now sold at Barneys and Sears. What used to be a thrift store, good for finding interesting, funny, inspiring treasures is now called a Vintage store that I can't afford.
So damnmit, when I wear a solid shirt and jeans every day it is a rebellious fashion statement. Against tilted foam hats bought in boutiques, ugg boots (even my mom has knock-offs of these), short skirt with ruffles, statement t-shirts and pre-torn jeans and shirts.
Pre-torn is pretty retarded.
Anyways, in the spirit of the Weird Owl show tonight at Luna Lounge, I am wearing the Wrangler® blue cordouroy (sp?) vest I got for my birthday. It's not an item that gets out often enough- when was the last time you saw a vest? I feel like Donna Pinciati, and it's not a bad feeling at all. I think I feel groovy.
There is a lot of news today (Martha!) but for me the biggest is my sister's birthday. She lives in FLA and has quite a day planned. It started with a Red Sox game, then a couple busses will take her and 70 of her closest friends to a place called the Mansion in South Beach (If you go to the link- go to the celebrity gallery page for a very yellow photo of Ashlee Simpson with Biz Markie). Sound's expensive so I hope every one of her sorority sisters are shelling out for this fête. I feel really old. I said groovy. I......

•Playboy has a nice interview with Michael Stipe.

What would the Crüe do?

2005-03-03T17:46:00.000-05:00

Today's Word:
gelid \JEL-id\, adjective:
Extremely cold; icy.

Should I brave the gelid conditions to go to Mötley Crüe's after party tonight? It will probably suck, but I am very curious, plus there is an open-bar situation. Plus I might have made a guest list. I havn't had good luck with these kinds of promotional events....but it could be interesting....

No Yorkie for me?

2005-03-03T16:43:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I buy lunch at a place called Guy & Gallard not only because it is convenient butbecause they carry chocolate imported from England that isn't available in most U.S. places. Anyone who has ever had a Cadbury Flake® or a Bounty® bar knows that this stuff is the real deal. So today I noticed there is a new addition to their candy bar selections. These new bars are stacked so I couldnt read the name on the front, but I could clearly read the side panel. In large, oblique, sans-serif, it reads: "IT'S NOT FOR GIRLS".
I asked to look at the candy bar and found out it is made by Nestle®. It's called YORKIE, and the designers made the 'O' in the name out of a 'no' symbol crossing out a woman symbol. ????!!!!!!
I found this as means of an explanation via MediaGuardian:

Yorkie chocolate bar has been relaunched with a new advertising campaign which is based around the concept that it's "not for girls." Following on from their macho Yorkie trucker, who represented the brand from the 70s to the early 90s, Nestle have decided that its time men had something that was just for them.

Nestle's marketing director said: "...we felt we needed to take a stand for the British bloke and reclaim some things in his life, starting with his chocolate... Most men these days feel as if the world is changing around them and it has become less and less politically correct to have anything that is only for males. Yorkie feels that this is an important part of men's happiness and is starting the reclaiming process of making a particular chocolate just for men." TV ads are running with the phrase "It's not for girls", while posters and billboards tell us "don't feed the birds", "not available in pink" and "King size, not Queen size."
The "O" in YORKIE has been altered to show a round road sign with a line crossing through a symbol of a woman. Right. So... they're actively disuading women from eating chocolate. Not the greatest marketing decision in the world, is it? You couldn't make this up could you? Just another reason not to buy Nestle products I guess, apart from the powdered milk / third world babies fiasco...

Oh, poor men. They never get anything just for themselves- those damn girls keep getting more power, more money and better vibrators. I'm sorry.

This is a genius way to get girls to buy a chocolate: dare them to to. I must admit it's simple logic is psychologically advanced. This kind of advertising makes me very, very nervous. I hope this is not a trend, but I'm sure it is the beginning of something annoying. How much snarky 'irony' can you attribute to a damn chocolate bar? Quite a bit, I guess.

Also, they look very delicious.

GD IE

2005-03-03T14:50:00.000-05:00

OMG! This site looks TERRIBLE in Explorer. I will try to fix it, but my HTML skills are poor. very poor. In the meantime download FireFox babies! it's the wave of the future. I can't even post amoothly here. this browser stinks.

Keeps getting better

2005-03-03T13:39:00.000-05:00

••The Drudge report has caused such an uproar that the New York Press website has crashed from all the traffic. Geez, you say a few things about the pope and people take notice. I guess the NYPress is on a roll. Last weeks cover story slammed CBGB's with the headline: "Hey! Ho! Let it Go!" it was about closing the place down as the bowrey gets made into the next SOHO. So thats the end of that business relationship- CB's didn't run their listings in the paper this week for the first time ever, and I doubt will be comping any tickets for members of the NYPress. At least the paper will get a good reading this week.

•On a more Anna Nicole Smith note:
Some people were made to blogossip. This is my new favorite blog. Great job Trent. You are truly, truly outrageous. No one else is the same.

The news?

2005-03-03T12:16:00.000-05:00

• ANTM recap: Brita will win. They havn't had a blonde yet, and she is fine! Best line of the night coutresy of Tiffany, whom wowed us last cycle but got kicked off for her thug-ishness:
"I went from America's most wanted to America's top model!" you go girl, I guess.
There were so many sob-stories from these deperate girls who think modeling is their only option in life. This season will be really good- I have a hot tip that they might be going to SOUTH AFRICA! you heard it here first.

•Denise Richards gets pinched, wakes up.
•Tonya Harding to Wrestle Trannie! "The gender-bender brawl takes place March 10 at Beach Bums in Fort Lauderdale."
•Throw out your razors. There are only 8 months of hair growing left!
•Just when we were so damn close to seeing some raw dead donkey scenes, they get cut.

I must get a life.

2005-03-03T11:05:00.000-05:00

I would like to be able to buy the new Burberry shades because of my blindingly bright future. Today is the kind of New York day that can trick you into thinking anything is possible. It's bright, crisp and full of possibilities. I can do Anything! But then the inevitable mania swings over and I realize I am working a job that puts me in debt every month and my cubicle neighbor is listening to a playlist of the smooth, rock-ish grooves of Lenny Kravitz, Coldplay and Sheryl Crow. I don't feel so invincible anymore and the office is out of tea. I mean, Lenny Kravitz! My headphones are going on for the rest of the damn day.

More Cycle 4

2005-03-02T17:14:00.000-05:00

This season has no plus-sized models but plenty of horse-faces. However I do notice that the girls are generally thinner, and taller than they have ever been. I think Tyra's got a major hit on her hands and fashion people are starting to latch on with enthusiasm (Finally!). So now the girls need to actually look like models (no offense Eva- your'e doing great! but youre very short). This article notices that they are still ugly and questionable in the looks department.

Have the C.H.U.D been biding their time, honing skills?

2005-03-02T15:41:00.000-05:00

Jim knipfel's disturbing theory about the latest unsolved mystery of NYC. C.H.U.D (cannibal human underground dweller). A boy's various body parts are still being found all over the damn city and he thinks it's the begining of an epidemic. hmmmm.

Wednesday. Premiere Day.

2005-03-02T14:50:00.000-05:00

Oh Man! I was so wrapped up with nudity I forgot to mention the most important news items of the damn day!
That giant from Everybody Loves Raymond won the Celebrity poker game on Bravo. He beat George Costanza, Theo Huxtable, Colin Quinn and Bonnie Hunt. I visited Phil Gordon's website yesterday and it didn't really satisfy. He did post a funny letter from a crazy fan, so I guess he gets points for that.
Tyra freaking Banks was on Conan last night and I didn't know about it. I did watch the UPN special about the girls last night and it was good. Amanda will never be a model, go blind and have to accept it. Nicole ( my favorite) doesn't seem to have a clue. Everyone else is predictably still determined to be America's Next Top Model. Poor idiots, they have nothing left.Ann and leah moved to Brooklyn- I can't wait for someone to find out where. Let the stalking begin! I can barely hold my excitement about tonight's dinner party for the premiere. I already bought the wine!
In case anyone missed Conan's latest 'In the year 2000' predictions here are some samples:

"A man will get a best buy at Best Buy, he will then get some staples at Staples, and then he will head over to Taco Bell and get diarrhea."
"The continent of Asia is arrested after its caught buying beer for Asia Minor."
"An Aardvark will accidentally ingest a bottle of Viagra and suddenly become a hard-vark, I'm very sorry."

Job ops: Opinionated 16-19 y.o. Guys & 18-19 y.o. Girls: $100 for 2 hours of work. Would you trust a company called Flamingo International San Francisco with a 16 yr old with spunk? You would? oh

The embarrassingly pathetic plea from Star Trek is working? that is gross.

Is it rude to go nude?

2005-03-02T13:39:00.000-05:00

I have always been fascinated that some people like to disrobe when they have had become very drunk. I end up doing the usual: being overly friendly, making plans I won't follow through with and thinking I am the most HI-larious person ever. I guess I'm thankful for my shame. Maybe after I tone up some more I will change my drinking habits to incorporate some nudity.

In addition to being naked, he had nacho cheese in his hair, on his face and on his shoulders, according to an interview with Spicer last year. He also had a strong odor of alcohol and was semi-incoherent, the officer said.

adorable!

But let's give these people a chance. Maybe if this poor guy was allowed to feel liberated without needing the excuse of drunkeness, he wouldnt have to steal late-night snacks like a common, naked criminal.
Violent Nudists! says:

In America, we can purchase a gun, walk outside with it, put it in a car, and drive to a firing range. In 1999, there were 1,609 gun-related deaths among 18- to 19-year-olds. Last time I checked, the number of people killed by looking at a nudist was somewhere between -- 1 and 0.

Being naked is funny to me- not especially sexy. If I see a naked (hot) woman it's usually beacause I'm looking at pornography and she is trying to look sexy (although I think this rarely works). It's much sexier when a woman does a little peek-a-boo a la Gypsy Rose Lee. And for men it's a whole different story...but I digress.

At the risk of being prosecuted for indecent exposure, people like to excercise naked, karaoke naked, and make snappy web sites about being naked. There is a great page of naked protesters and to my surprise, they are not all ugly, dirty hippies.
I guess I'm envious of these people's independant spirit. My family used to be pretty free-spirited when I was younger and we would walk around naked, but I do get creeped out by the community of family nudity. I mean, going to another families house for dinner and EVERYONE is naked? seeing your own dad without clothes is bad enough, but someone elses dad? gross.
Also I keep thinking about that Seinfeld episode- there is 'good' and 'bad' naked, for sure. And as far as I know from David Sedaris' account in his essay Naked, most nudists activities would fall in the category of 'bad' naked.

If you have any questions, refer to this insiprational page that uges you to "Reject the shame forced on you by the perverted minds of others"

OK. Now I've had more than enough naked for a while. I feel disgusting. I'm sorry. ugh.

Do the words: "Noted Fashion Photographer" mean anything to you?

2005-03-01T14:43:00.000-05:00

WINCE! at Mr. and Mrs. J.
CRINGE! at Janice's new face peel

RECOIL! in disgust from Tyras hairstyles and "home-spun" wisdom

GAPE! at the "model's" childish behavior

SQUEAL! with delight over the prospect of beginning a brand-spanking new season of, as Jenipher so famously wrote on her ass: ANTM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
respecito- or whatever

I've been illegally invited to a party hosted by Trace magazine for the upcoming fourth cycle of America's Next Top Model. Yaya herself will be there (the runner-up, but she still got signed by Ford) I won't go, because I don't think I will like the crowd, but if anyone is interested in crashing:
Tuesday, March 1st 2005 @ TAJ
48 W 21st street between 5th and 6th Avenue
7PM - 11PM
Wherever I am, I will be watching:"What the divas are up to now" that airs tonight on the UPN
The real fun is tomorrow night. I will be attending a catered party on the upper east side for the occasion.
I mean have you seen the artwork for this cycle? lovely...just lovely.I have to go read up on the new girls bios. I might start a pool. I wonder how to do that.

What happens when priests play game shows?

2005-03-01T13:44:00.000-05:00

God fucks with them: This shit is funny- I promise. It's better than that lady on the Newlywed game show.

Anna is, a binge drinker. Anna is, a binge drinker naaoooooww

2005-03-01T12:55:00.000-05:00

If you love NY- North York England that is- you shouldn't tell the papers about how much you drink. You are so daft! Shame on you Anna!

Riding the Snake

2005-03-01T11:28:00.000-05:00

Thanks to my Nubbin for sending this my way. When I was in high school I was very much into The Doors and all things Morrison. Why does every suburban girl go through that weird Doors, Joplin thing? My BF Bou and I would listen to classic rock whenever we had boys over. I guess nothing puts you in the mood like overly cocky, drugged out wierdos. I think it was my junior year in college by the time I finally took that damn poster of the Lizard King off my wall. I gave it to Nubbin a few years after that, and I think with all the moving around apartments the last few years, old Jim ended up back in my closet. Rolled up, but not thrown out.

Very Useful:

2005-02-28T16:23:00.000-05:00

‰
As a former waitron in NYC, and aspiring gourmand I like
keeping up with the food scene. So special thanks to
Manhattan Waitress for this link she dubs "best site of all time"
Look up restaurants your friends rave about all the time and tell them that the kitchen staff has been fined for being un-hygenic.
I give you: The NYC Dept. of Health

The Oscars: not entertaining at all.

2005-02-28T14:13:00.000-05:00

Today= ⁄

I wonder if the Fug Ladies have ever been told about FUDABUGLY- a middle/high school term for fucking damn butt ugly. I mean, who hasn't? Maybe its a Masshole thing.
ANYway I love checking them out and I rushed to them today to see what they could tell me about Hilary Swank's nasty purple straight-jacket dress.
Why don't people seem to care what they wear to the damn Oscars? I would. I may not always choose the best damn outfit, but I would want to look in the mirror before leaving the house and think: "yeah, I could be pretty." Not :"well, this doesnt look good on me at all. I guess I'll wear it to the most photographed media frenzy of the year."
The Ladies have the situation totally under control- they manage to assure me Hilswanks outfit choice will not go unpunished. they compare it to a mullet:

The back of this dress is a stunningly sexy cut-to-there knockout, but the front has Hilary Swank in an unfortunate chokehold....it's a sartorical mullet: party in the back, all business in the front.

And the Guardian says this:

Swank: yet to realise the value of tit tape.

I LOVE how the Brits just bandy about words likt tits and cunt. I think it's very posh. I mean, calling someone a tit is probably the funniest sounding insult I've ever heard %

DAMN YOU DAILY CANDY!
Not everyone has access to mumsie's Bergdorf account. These are the cutest shoes I will never own. Nice Flash animation too, dammit.~

From Froghat studios- awesome artwork and lovely music in this little short. It's the tale of a little girl helping out the Big Guy.Ú

I can't figure out how to put pictures up. Is Flickr my only freaking option? I have to look this shit up.~

Ode to Orbach:

2005-02-27T15:27:00.000-05:00

I was a huge fan, and now finally, Cat Town has paid him a proper tribute. Thank you kittens!

Sorry lovely losers, but HTML sux!

2005-02-27T14:58:00.000-05:00

I'm just kidding. I just don't know what I am doing. I hope this all changes soon- as I become a masterful coding wiz.

So today I made Diane Forley's Frozen Mocha Roulade for our little party later -and I must say I am nervous about the results. It's wrapped up in plastic as a mushy log in the freezer. I hope its frozen completely in time. I used too dry a parchment paper and half of my cake layer stuck to the damn paper. However, everytime I think something has gone terribly wrong in the process, it turns out pretty well in the end.

I saw the play Democracy last night. It was really thick with German history and names. My dull wits couldn't grasp much of what was going on, but the main actor was in the Waltons (Jonn-Boy) and was really over-doing his part. I think he's still trying to get away from being cast as dumb -hick because he was being really overly dramatic. As a whole I thought it was kind of gay. No, not homosexual gay (although it is Broadway), but lame gay as in overly corny. Got it? My favorite part of the evening was the beautiful set.

There is a really scary photo of Clint Eastwood in the Times Mag by INEZ VAN LAMSWEERDE and VINOODH MATADIN It's pretty cool- and Kate Winslet looks beautiful. Ass usual.

I dreamt I was at a super cool party and was having just the best time with Kate Winslet, YaYa (ANTM), Lindsay Lohan and Halle Berry. I think I looked at too many gossip rags while waiting for my manicure yesterday. I waited for 1 whole hour at the Mexican place ($5) and gave up to go across the street to a Polish place, where it was more expensive ($10) but they saw me right away.

All in all, getting to greenpoint, waiting around and then trying to get to Manhattan for dinner took about 3 hours. Hopefully I will be able to maintain my non-nailbiting long enough to get another manicure in a few weeks. I have to bribe myself with shiny pretty things otherwise I'm a lazy complainer who bites her nails, cuticles and all surrounding skin in the finger-tip area. NOw I'm just a regular complainer who with a nice manicure.

A Haiku for dinner, not people

2005-02-25T19:26:00.000-05:00

I wrote a haiku about my sandwich- and it's not that great.

Cracked pepper delight!
Cheese, mustard, mayo and bread
Blessed angels sing.

This Weekend:

Get cheap manicure in Greenpoint

Visit Christina's for some fried pierogis with sourcream AND applesauce [I might take time to check out the slutty/good-girl thing those waitresses have going on. Hott!]

Decide what dessert to make for our dinner party on Sunday: Its either Diane Forleys frozen mocha cake, or Les Halles (via Bourdin's) tarts. I'm leaning towards Diane asss usual. that woman is a freaking genius with dessert. R.I.P. Verbena.

Taxes?

Welcome Nothings Everywhere!

2005-02-25T14:22:00.000-05:00

I wish I could say what was in my heart, but to properly thank you, in advance, for all the things you will be putting up with in thise blog, I will need the help of a good Scott.
This blog be a way for me to make interesting comments on everything I see and think about. And along the way we will all learn a little something. Plus I live in New York (CITY!) so I'm really up on things. I had to tell my grandma what a 'Metrosexual' was last year at my cousins graduation–she is such a rube ( "she" can be attributed to both grandma and cousin)
This Blog will be fun for you AND me. (Mostly ME)
I love you all!