Thursday, March 31, 2005

New season..breaking through...ungh

So today I got a C + so to speak, on my ADD test. Meaning: on a scale of 0 (no ADD) to 10 (ten year old boy on pixie sticks and soda) I came out as a perfect 5, on every test. This means I am not that challenged, but I am not in the clear either- Dr. laughed at me a little when I couldn't remember the question about how often I forget to pay attention. yeah, haha. Whatever, I guess I feel pretty good about myself- hes not giving me Ritalin, just upping the Wellbutrin-so I wont need to be on 3 different meds...Good times with ritalin in college.... things are always better when they're not actually meant for you.

Some Songs I wish I wrote:
  • Riannon
  • Chain of Fire
  • You were right (built to spill)
  • Oh, Darlin
  • Vacation (go-gos)
  • All Apologies
  • She's like a Rainbow
  • Heart of glass
  • Hang on to your ego
I like my new office space, but I think we might be moving again...we'll see. I don't see why I can't get a 10k raise. Technically it is fair.

My fingers still hurt from playing intense guitar scales for six hours five days ago.

: The world is full of more than I will ever understand. (I feel bad for the DVD cover designer)
ps.
The braindead girl died today despite the lord's soldiers attempts to stick tubes back in. Yesterday I found her blog.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

frizzzzz

last weekend I went on another bender and friday blended into saturday afternoon too easily.

I did manage to go to N.Sixth for shows and was happy I did.

I also managed to get my ass in gear for the free WELLA studio haircut. Being a hair model sounds glamorous, but the girl took off the front parts of my long hair and now I have a shag/mullet. Makes me wish my hairdryer was this!

Anyways, I just had my first shower with the damn new hairdo and I am still unhappy about it- I had just gotten my hair at a nice place- and then someone mentioned FREE and I leap!. From now on I'm only letting Aveda students cut my hair. Those people are geniuses.

Also, I went running for a solid half hour and it is colder than I thought. But it was still pretty nice. I ran around the outside of the track at the park and didn't get attacked or run over!

Work sucks purple balls this week. can't wait for it to be over~however I have been making alot of nice color designs lately so hopefully they will be enjoyed by clients too.

Today I saved on toothpaste AND conditioner by using my Duane Reade Dollar Rewards Club Membership Card...you should get one too they have sales all the time.

I wonder what happened to:
  • Nelly Furtado~The little bird ruled the airwaves then dissapeared.
  • Rene Russo~the (crappy, I hear) sequel to her big movie is out and no one's mentioned her name at all! Does everyone think it was Uma in Get Shorty?
All I came up with is that Rene is alive, and Nelly has been making albums secretly, and hasnt abandoned the raggae ways she was leaning towards...oh who the hell cares.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Copacetic

I think my word of the day is kind of my horoscope. Today was copacetic, and a lot of tensions had worked themselves out by the end of the day.
My dad came through BIG TIME for me today with some tax relief. I am feeling so damn glad about it- I can finally exhale for the first time since January. He's come through a couple times like this, when it really counts, thank jebus. I hate being as old as I am and having to ask him for money, when mostly all I want is to raise enough money to help my mom have a copacetic day for the first time in like ten years. Soon, soon....

••So now, with new freedom, I have been going over possible course schedules, internship opps, gym discounts, student clubs and organizations, etc...I have never been so excited about school before. They won't know what hit them. I'm feeling like winning every scholarship, making deans list and winning awards every few weeks...Inevitably, this will all bring me down come the fall when I have a breakdown and re-think this whole snafu...but until then YAY!

•I will try to convince Trollbäck & Co. to take me on as an intern over next summer- I'm not sure if they take interns but, like I said, I'm feeling ambitious, dammit.

•I got a new idea for Nubbin's festivities, but since he's so nosy I can't talk openly on my own damn blog- I guess I'll write about it on the one he doesn't know about-HA
I will say there will be some savory things added to the usual avalanche of sweetness I provide.

•I watched the American Office tonight- WTF? It's just re-enacting the original with American accents and "Hillary Rodham Clinton" instead of "Camilla Parker Bowles." It was CRAP. None of the originals tension, discomfort or realness came through. It was indeed like a dumbass BK commercial with that guy from E's 'soup'.{ C- }I ended up kind of enjoying Fox's "Life on a Stick" not the funniest stuff but the potential is definitely there- and it seemed enforced which should earn it an Emmy right away comparatively. (bitchy and self-righteous about TV am I!)
•Typing 'righteous', feels pretty righteous..

•I have to work on designing a web site for a friend- so I'm trying to do something that will force me into HTML depths I've avoided until now.

•LOG: Pretty woman X2, various Shiffer's- My ass is still enormous- what the hell!
things have to shape up man.

• Oh, and I sent out a mass e-mail, whoring myself out for extra work, to everyone I know. G-kins is insistent on the voiceover career option. I'm so totally tempted- how hard can it be?

Monday, March 21, 2005

"showing off doesn't seem to be a real job, does it?"

•I have heard alot about the American version of 'The Office' and people are saying it's going to be good. Who are these people in the know ?
The
NYT has an article on Ricky Gervais and his work on a new show called "extras"
I hope the American Office isn't just a long drawn out version of those Burger King commercials: Co-workers ordering lunch and acting snarky around office supplies.

Peppered with coldplay and Dave Mathews

The poisoning was on a full roll this weekend and I had a great time singing, dancing, eating, drinking and going home after the sun came up. I still have a rasp in my voice from screaming out loud Saturday night to the musaak beats of a sub-standard karaoke machine.
Since none of birthday girls cheapo friends brought her anything nice we made sure she left with a bouquet of ballons stolen from a neighboring birthday party. I think she liked that.

I've never been too crazy about Blackjack, because it happens so quickly, but I'm afraid this article tempts me like crazy. like really CRAZY!

Colleague is playing a medly of songs I had my fill of ten years ago:
walking in memphis, the wrong way (sublime), Mercedes Benz (Janis) etc.... It's pretty annoying.

Possible lead on practice space + drummer + another voice +bass/guitar = hmmmm?

I'm a hunger.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Hey there, Fancy Pants

So Nubbin came over and helped me with finances some more and I feel so much better. I will stick to my shiny new BUDGET (quicken like chicken)!

Also, the Motley Fool directed me to a site that lets me check my credit reports and get my credit score...it cost some money, but I will get updates on my status and since a loan will be asked for later this year I need to know where I stand- and the results werent bad like I thought they would be.
This is the beginning of my first fiscally reponsible year! I've even budgeted for gambling.This is all in hte positive new directon of my future- that is actually thinking I might have one was a major step.
So the next 4 years are very important and will be filled with maturing, enlightening experiences.
- I guess in between all the growth I'll throw in few benders, late nights and poison.

Sweet, sweet, poison......

Friday, March 18, 2005

Speak Up!

Thanks for the comment! I don't want to get dooced, so I can't tell you where I work. All I know is everyone is trying to look very busy and important around here so prove their worth- So I've been thinking up band names like crazy:

More potential band names:
  • Moira and the Music
  • The Exec.s
  • My Holy War
  • The Due Dates
  • Pitted Dates
  • Paste Taste

The Go Team!

I read about them in today's Metro, and then it seemed as though they were on everyones (blogs) playlists. So What the hell- I Limewired their album it's pretty cool ! Not since the Avalances has sampling been so much fun. Main difference is that the girl sings over it and she sounds awesome. The website is nice with good photos of them having fun. They are playing in the city next week- maybe I can get in for free..thats right, I know people..

More band names I thought of:
  • The Sweet Seeds
  • The Bruised Ego's or
  • The Bruisers
  • The Cabal

Two more people got laid off since the morning.

Via Spamusement

I havn't visited the site for a while and todays edition reminded me how awesome it is!

Plus I got a new Annie song today and it's soo good. It's called Helpless for Love. I will just get the album soon.

Via UMC

I really wish there was an appropriate way to type out me laughing and snickering withought resorting to 'lol'

It is soooo gay

What was I saying?

Set up Quicken last night- no more pecuniary problems for me! thats what I thought anyway until I opened up the latest keyspan and coned bill- totaling $212 how is it possible to use that much electricity?! I'm so glad I won't have to pay it after this month.
It's mostly the roomate:
•Plugs in amp for hours at a time
•Leaves lights on through the night and during the day
•Leaves DVD player on
•Leaves cable on

I was unable to brush my teeth today because the bathroom was being used for horrible noises.

•About today:
≈I am wearing the tight jeans for the first time outside of the house. Nubbin, don't get upset.
≈A couple people at work got laid off. I really have to start getting some call-backs.
≈Listening to LCD soundsystem- pretty fun
≈Will try to plan out the next weeks meals by being VERY organized and scientific.
≈I have to have $8 last me until friday.

TMN has a cooll link to a list of bands that reference other bands: a practice I endorse.

Last night I dreamt that I was part of J.Lo's staff and we were heading to some media blitz thing in a mall. On the way we ran into Howard Stern and the two hugged. He looked like Howard Stern, including the height, but was dressed like Woody Allen- he was wearing a button down tucked into khakis and had a short haircut and glasses and a young girl in tow.

while all of us now were walking to the event, JK shows up and hugs Howard Stern and I thought ' I guess it was all for show'. Then it's a blur except for at one point JK. dropped to the floor ( in the exact way that Rebecca from Top Model did; loud head crack on the floor) He was really out and I remember calling EMS, and them saying it didn't look good. I went throuhg his cell phone to find someone to alert, but everyone said he was a notorious liar and very evasive about his personal life so the numbers there wouldnt be real- I called the number for "Mamma Money" and got an angry lady...I don't remember what happened after that.


In a couple weeks I will have a test at my psychiatrist's for ADD- i took a mini test yesterday with him and I din't get a perfect score- in fact I missed the same question twice!
I'm supposed to be thinking about how this might have played out during my life an di am realizing I have been far less that focused as far back as I can remember. Oh well. I guess all that pot in college just made everything worse.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

I think I'll be a cater waiter after all.

••Today at the Office:
*Men's Toilet receives an electrical fire dropping from the ceiling above it. Have you ever seen a melted toilet seat? I have!
* My offices are moving into another section of the floor- we are now going to be overrun with TWO men for men publications. The gays will be getting some good real estate, but we'll still have decent light- I think.

••Other than that I am enjoying:
  • Neil Patrick Harris the wait is over!
  • French women DO get fat.
  • interview with Harold McGee reprinted here (as well as lots of good food links)
••Oh I saw Steve Martin at the Armory show- best sighting ever!

Monday, March 14, 2005

Can't trust that day

Now that Ballys won't have me anymore, unless I give them money that is, I am left to my own lack of motivation for exercise. I bought a book the other day- but I think I really want the new Billy Blanks Bootcamp videos! I really want to be tight for Florida- and the summer time- and the rest of my soft life. I finally got a chance to work at a restaurant on the weekends- I have to check them out thoroughly in Zagats first. There go my weekends- but It's kind of the right time- I'm completely busted broke. I have to start hustling something. Might as well be food.
•••NEW: I have a new
idol. She won the Food network wedding cake thing- and she makes some cool-ass cakes. She went to Pratt and worked designing for Tiffany's- pretty cool. Work is lame- I'm gonna try to look up ways to understand statistics- my new poker book is really hard.
•••Because of a friend of a friend I get Bust Magazine dropped in my cubicle every month when I least expect it. This is a wired magazine for grrrls and crafterbunnies. It's not all embarrassing, but mostly , it is. BUT Amy Sedaris is on the cover and there are some lovely photos. Also, it directed me to
this interesting phenomenon. I agree theoretically and ecologically, but I just don't know. Maybe somethings were meant to be disposable.
•Savannah....

Friday, March 11, 2005

The Hat!

El Sombrero for din-din- and margaritas is ON! Some people are FULL of great ideas.

Busted from behind

•••Well, I've broken my butt. I think its my hamstring, but it's very close to my ass and it kills!
So I guess its good that my Bally's days are over. I should have taken them up on their offer, but I can't sign a 3 year contract for anything.
I'm looking forward to a rager this evening- and will try not to injure myself further.
It's pretty busy at work today, but I made an ad that I like so I feel pretty good about that.
My new poker book already has my head spinning about odds and fractions- I feel very stupid, but am determined. In fact, I'm thinking about having the boys over next saturday for a tourney.
••Oh I got my girls scout cookies from the adorable Gabrielle. 2 boxes of Samoas? Why yessss.
••I also have a reason to research Savannah GA, for living situations. I'll need some time on the internet.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Thanks Nubbin!

100 !

Sexy Ray-Ray

•••Oh mY! Rachel Ray has a sexuality? Too weird.....yet...

••New 50's are pink..check out the interactive on the right. Still not as nice as other countries' money.

Boing Boing and The times wrote about Wil Wheatons blog, and Kottke picked it up and loads of others are going to the site. It's supposed to be an online weblong of an actor named Wil Wheaton, who was once so awesomely adorable as a kid that he made me cry every damn time I watch that movie, but I never saw him on Star Trek.

Further or Farther??

••I was waiting in my psychiatrists office and was delighted they had a brand new magazine! I looked through the fresh edition of New York Magazine and it was cool. But there was a chart that reminded me of someone else's charts so I bravely wrote her a letter of warning. Here is that letter, reprinted with my permission:

What's up Rabbit?
LTR, 2nd time e-mailer. The first time was a couple years ago when you had some sort of contest and I knew the answer so I e-mailed you about it.
Anyways, this month's New York Magazine has a page about the "approval matrix" (pg.154, it's unfortunately not online).
The 'Approval Matrix' is a four quadrant chart detailing some current trends as they fall into the categories of what we 'approve' and 'disapprove' in relation to what is 'highbrow' and what is 'lowbrow'. Maybe they have an old reader of yours at the helm, but didn't you pioneer that chart like, forever ago?! Back in the days where there was still a tiny little penis, before there was a 'Rabbitblog' or a 'Wonkette'? Those fools think they are so clever!

I guess the purpose of the letter is just to give you a heads up that someone is biting your steez and to say I'm glad Filler's still online- it's good fun being able to go back and re-read those gems.
Also, I'm sorry about giving you another damn magazine to read.
truly yours,
Sweetykins


Doesn't sound too gay does it? I mean lame, not homosexual.

••ANTM was a dooooozie last night! Brita (my number one pick for the win) was the first to go!!! While Nubbin thought that would mean the end of my dedication to this cycle, nothing could be further from the truth. This upset has renewed my faith in the show, and reminded me that in ANTM, just as in life, anything is possible!. Thanks Tyra. (Tyra is getting a bit full of herself on this cycle- which will be interesting as the competition remains lukewarm)
I'm leaning towards the one who looks like Carmen Kass or the hipster/edgy-girl from two years ago.

••So I took the first step. I admitted I have a problem. I keep losing at poker. Yesterday I bought a book. Today I will fashion a cover for it out of a paper bag, á la middle school, so I can read it on the subway without the rolling-eyed superiority and disdain that hangs in the L train (usually being rolled out by me, so I know it's there).

••I wish I had a flask- Maybe for the summer time I will get one. If you search for 'flask' in MightyGoods they have the best. I especially like the small one you can attach to you KEY CHAIN! Finally a company that understands my needs.

••Also I will try to figure out enough HTML to post a list of all things I cannot buy. This will prolong the pinning, enhance the emptiness and perpetuate the self-pity. I know!

••Boy today's entry sounds pretty bad. I think I'll have some coffee. I wish I heard back from grad schools already. jeez. I'm actually in a pretty good mood.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Will work for money

OMG! I just did my taxes. Even though I barely scrape by (read: go into more debt every month) they want MORE! lots more. I am glad someone brought a brick of fudge into the office today. I'm gonna need it.

FU craigslist, hotjobs, dice, mediabistro, monster, AND careerbuilder!

••I've been applying for new jobs all afternoon. I guess my technique sux cause I never get a single response. Never. Not a good response in 4 years. I did get some good tips about interviewing- but I don't ever get that far.

• I really like this new Sony® phone. The screen says it's playing "The Mops" Late July, Working Hours. I Googled the band and came up with the first psychadelic Japanese band. But they only had one album and it wasn't called Working Hours. There is a song by them on that Nuggets box set. You know the one.

•Also my mom wanted me and my sisters to be on the family version of The Amazing Race® but I am not ready for that kind of stress. But we would all like to travel around the world. I just don't want the world to see me doing stupid shit and looking ugly and fat. Sorry mom, we'll get rich another way- I'm bound to find that big bag of money soon. And we'll keep it!

•••I'm going to have to fly through the gym tonight so I can make it honme in time for Suze Orman's PBS special, because I'm young, broke and shlumpy. Oh crap! ANTM (go Brita!) is also on at 8!. I guess I'll have to buy Suze's damn book.

••for all the ass blasting ( by this I mean 'working out' ) I am still to grande for a certain dress. once i no longer strench the sides of that thing I will have made it! then I'll have to keep it like that and I can't even think about how that really blows.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

The Name Game

Whether or not I ever am in another band again, I am always trying out band names in my head. Lots of people do it too. I want to start writing them down since my memory fails and fails.

•Off Color

•Harriet
•Globo-Chem
•The Majorettes (this sounds like it already exists)
•The Ads
•Used books
•The Cues (this will be my tribute to Jeanette Lee)
•Tiny hands..ooh I like Tiny:
  • tiny time
  • tinyville
  • tiny moons
  • The tiny wonders or just 'tiny wonder'
  • tiny times

Is it raining or snowing? What the HELL!

•Well, I had been wondering what the Karate kid had to say about Hillary Swank. Ralphie doesn't look so hot.
Since I'm on the Post, I thought Grubman was BFF with Tara Reid:

On Lindsay Lohan:
"She's so played. Who does she think she is? She's going out every night of the week ... I mean the girl is like Tara Reid."

Why does the world want to keep looking at this obnoxious, idiot anyway. I'd like one good reason she should have a reality show. Things are getting out of hand.
Also, socialites playing DodgeBall? How completely charming! How plebeian! When will this kind of crap end!
•Are we in a Golden Age of Fugdom? Salon thinks so, and I agree. Maybe there is revolution of ugly going on.
Martin Denny, pioneer of tiki exotica music died. You know- the stuff that goes along with rockabilly culture like pulp drawings of half-naked ladies and lots of bamboo and grass skirts. In small doses, it's a change from the ordinary. An amateur reviewer at Amazon says this about the music:
The music is not of Hawaii or Polynesia or any other "real" culture, but a complete commercial fabrication, the world of the tiki lodge and resort Hawaii. It brings the guilty pleasures of a Hawaiian vacation into your living room, soothes the spirit, and lets the mind drift away. A must for summer nights on the deck.

I admit that on a grey, rainy and snowy day some xylophone plinks and bird calls sound pretty good. R.I.P Denny. Where the hell is my Mai-tai?!

•••Feeling better. Will try to go swimming tonight. I oonly have a few more days of free gym membership. I still have some lbs. to lose. I missed Fat Actress last night but I don't really mind. Today I will finish my taxes and look for a better job online. Goddamn I need a better job. I do have a window though. Windows don't pay the damn rent y'all.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Po-mo-pets & ho's

I really want a kitten, but other people's damn allergies are standing in my way. I went to Petland over the weekend, and was so desperate I actually cooed over some tiger fish. Once I bought some Neon Tetras from WalMArt when I was in college. I bought 4 and they fought and ate each other until there was only one asshole left. I 'gave' him to my mom and he lived for another 5 damn years! I'm hesitant to go through that again, but I really want a pet. Even though I am a little nauseated by this site's title, they have really nice things. I kind of like the BIOrb Aquarium and the Racetrack bowl the best.

••Most influencial/powerful women in America. Condi tops the list, but I could never do anything on her orders. If Oprah asked,I would probably join the army. Good thing she's lower on the list.

•I don't see why I can't be a pastry chef AND a rock star. Then they'd all listen.

Pope wins

So I just heard the editor of the New York Press has been given the order of a 2 week, non-paid suspension. Insulted by the offer, he's chosen to leave altogether. So-long Mr.Koyen, good luck! I guess people are really serious about making sure no one makes unfunny jokes about the pope dying. I hope from now on people only run top-shelf material. In case you missed the hoop-la.

Friday, March 04, 2005

It's a television reference!

When I was younger I had very daring fashion sense, if I do say so. I mixed prints, wore fishnets under black shorts, wore Doc martens with dresses etc... I know! Outrageous behavior! Sooo rebellious! Sooo original!
Fine, so I wasn't
that trendsetting, but I did like to spice things up a bit.
Now, the most adventurous I look is when I wear a fraying old gold belt that is not so gold anymore.

One of the resons I've become a clothes bore is because what used to be interesting and cool, is now sold at Barneys and Sears. What used to be a thrift store, good for finding interesting, funny, inspiring treasures is now called a Vintage store that I can't afford.
So damnmit, when I wear a solid shirt and jeans every day it
is a rebellious fashion statement. Against tilted foam hats bought in boutiques, ugg boots (even my mom has knock-offs of these), short skirt with ruffles, statement t-shirts and pre-torn jeans and shirts.
Pre-torn is pretty retarded.
Anyways, in the spirit of the Weird Owl show tonight at Luna Lounge, I am wearing the Wrangler® blue cordouroy (sp?) vest I got for my birthday. It's not an item that gets out often enough- when was the last time you saw a vest? I feel like Donna Pinciati, and it's not a bad feeling at all. I think I feel groovy.
There is a lot of news today (Martha!) but for me the biggest is my sister's birthday. She lives in FLA and has quite a day planned. It started with a Red Sox game, then a couple busses will take her and 70 of her closest friends to a place called the Mansion in South Beach (If you go to the link- go to the celebrity gallery page for a very yellow photo of Ashlee Simpson with Biz Markie). Sound's expensive so I hope every one of her sorority sisters are shelling out for this fête. I feel really old. I said
groovy. I......

•Playboy has a nice interview with Michael Stipe.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

What would the Crüe do?

Today's Word:
gelid \JEL-id\, adjective:

Extremely cold; icy.

Should I brave the gelid conditions to go to Mötley Crüe's after party tonight? It will probably suck, but I am very curious, plus there is an open-bar situation. Plus I might have made a guest list. I havn't had good luck with these kinds of promotional events....but it could be interesting....

No Yorkie for me?

Sometimes I buy lunch at a place called Guy & Gallard not only because it is convenient butbecause they carry chocolate imported from England that isn't available in most U.S. places. Anyone who has ever had a Cadbury Flake® or a Bounty® bar knows that this stuff is the real deal. So today I noticed there is a new addition to their candy bar selections. These new bars are stacked so I couldnt read the name on the front, but I could clearly read the side panel. In large, oblique, sans-serif, it reads: "IT'S NOT FOR GIRLS".
I asked to look at the candy bar and found out it is made by Nestle®. It's called YORKIE, and the designers made the 'O' in the name out of a 'no' symbol crossing out a woman symbol. ????!!!!!!
I found this as means of an explanation via MediaGuardian:
Yorkie chocolate bar has been relaunched with a new advertising campaign which is based around the concept that it's "not for girls." Following on from their macho Yorkie trucker, who represented the brand from the 70s to the early 90s, Nestle have decided that its time men had something that was just for them.

Nestle's marketing director said: "...we felt we needed to take a stand for the British bloke and reclaim some things in his life, starting with his chocolate... Most men these days feel as if the world is changing around them and it has become less and less politically correct to have anything that is only for males. Yorkie feels that this is an important part of men's happiness and is starting the reclaiming process of making a particular chocolate just for men." TV ads are running with the phrase "It's not for girls", while posters and billboards tell us "don't feed the birds", "not available in pink" and "King size, not Queen size."
The "O" in YORKIE has been altered to show a round road sign with a line crossing through a symbol of a woman. Right. So... they're actively disuading women from eating chocolate. Not the greatest marketing decision in the world, is it? You couldn't make this up could you? Just another reason not to buy Nestle products I guess, apart from the powdered milk / third world babies fiasco...
Oh, poor men. They never get anything just for themselves- those damn girls keep getting more power, more money and better vibrators. I'm sorry.

This is a genius way to get girls to buy a chocolate: dare them to to. I must admit it's simple logic is psychologically advanced. This kind of advertising makes me very, very nervous. I hope this is not a trend, but I'm sure it is the beginning of something annoying. How much snarky 'irony' can you attribute to a damn chocolate bar? Quite a bit, I guess.

Also, they look very delicious.

GD IE

OMG! This site looks TERRIBLE in Explorer. I will try to fix it, but my HTML skills are poor. very poor. In the meantime download FireFox babies! it's the wave of the future. I can't even post amoothly here. this browser stinks.

Keeps getting better

••The Drudge report has caused such an uproar that the New York Press website has crashed from all the traffic. Geez, you say a few things about the pope and people take notice. I guess the NYPress is on a roll. Last weeks cover story slammed CBGB's with the headline: "Hey! Ho! Let it Go!" it was about closing the place down as the bowrey gets made into the next SOHO. So thats the end of that business relationship- CB's didn't run their listings in the paper this week for the first time ever, and I doubt will be comping any tickets for members of the NYPress. At least the paper will get a good reading this week.

•On a more Anna Nicole Smith note:
Some people were made to blogossip. This is my new favorite blog. Great job Trent. You are truly, truly outrageous. No one else is the same.

The news?

• ANTM recap: Brita will win. They havn't had a blonde yet, and she is fine! Best line of the night coutresy of Tiffany, whom wowed us last cycle but got kicked off for her thug-ishness:
"I went from America's most wanted to America's top model!" you go girl, I guess.
There were so many sob-stories from these deperate girls who think modeling is their only option in life. This season will be really good- I have a hot tip that they might be going to SOUTH AFRICA! you heard it here first.

•Denise Richards gets pinched, wakes up.
•Tonya Harding to Wrestle Trannie! "The gender-bender brawl takes place March 10 at Beach Bums in Fort Lauderdale."
•Throw out your razors. There are only 8 months of hair growing left!
•Just when we were so damn close to seeing some raw dead donkey scenes, they get cut.

I must get a life.

I would like to be able to buy the new Burberry shades because of my blindingly bright future. Today is the kind of New York day that can trick you into thinking anything is possible. It's bright, crisp and full of possibilities. I can do Anything! But then the inevitable mania swings over and I realize I am working a job that puts me in debt every month and my cubicle neighbor is listening to a playlist of the smooth, rock-ish grooves of Lenny Kravitz, Coldplay and Sheryl Crow. I don't feel so invincible anymore and the office is out of tea. I mean, Lenny Kravitz! My headphones are going on for the rest of the damn day.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

More Cycle 4

This season has no plus-sized models but plenty of horse-faces. However I do notice that the girls are generally thinner, and taller than they have ever been. I think Tyra's got a major hit on her hands and fashion people are starting to latch on with enthusiasm (Finally!). So now the girls need to actually look like models (no offense Eva- your'e doing great! but youre very short). This article notices that they are still ugly and questionable in the looks department.

Have the C.H.U.D been biding their time, honing skills?

Jim knipfel's disturbing theory about the latest unsolved mystery of NYC. C.H.U.D (cannibal human underground dweller). A boy's various body parts are still being found all over the damn city and he thinks it's the begining of an epidemic. hmmmm.

Wednesday. Premiere Day.

Oh Man! I was so wrapped up with nudity I forgot to mention the most important news items of the damn day!
That giant from
Everybody Loves Raymond won the Celebrity poker game on Bravo. He beat George Costanza, Theo Huxtable, Colin Quinn and Bonnie Hunt. I visited Phil Gordon's website yesterday and it didn't really satisfy. He did post a funny letter from a crazy fan, so I guess he gets points for that.
Tyra freaking Banks was on Conan last night and I didn't know about it. I did watch the UPN special about the girls last night and it was good. Amanda will never be a model, go blind and have to accept it. Nicole ( my favorite) doesn't seem to have a clue. Everyone else is predictably still determined to be America's Next Top Model. Poor idiots, they have nothing left.Ann and leah moved to Brooklyn- I can't wait for someone to find out where. Let the stalking begin! I can barely hold my excitement about tonight's dinner party for the premiere. I already bought the wine!
In case anyone missed Conan's latest 'In the year 2000' predictions here are some samples:
"A man will get a best buy at Best Buy, he will then get some staples at Staples, and then he will head over to Taco Bell and get diarrhea."
"The continent of Asia is arrested after its caught buying beer for Asia Minor."
"An Aardvark will accidentally ingest a bottle of Viagra and suddenly become a hard-vark, I'm very sorry."

Job ops:
Opinionated 16-19 y.o. Guys & 18-19 y.o. Girls: $100 for 2 hours of work. Would you trust a company called Flamingo International San Francisco with a 16 yr old with spunk? You would? oh

The embarrassingly pathetic plea from Star Trek is working? that is gross.

Is it rude to go nude?

I have always been fascinated that some people like to disrobe when they have had become very drunk. I end up doing the usual: being overly friendly, making plans I won't follow through with and thinking I am the most HI-larious person ever. I guess I'm thankful for my shame. Maybe after I tone up some more I will change my drinking habits to incorporate some nudity.
In addition to being naked, he had nacho cheese in his hair, on his face and on his shoulders, according to an interview with Spicer last year. He also had a strong odor of alcohol and was semi-incoherent, the officer said.
adorable!

But let's give these people a chance. Maybe if this poor guy was allowed to feel liberated without needing the excuse of drunkeness, he wouldnt have to steal late-night snacks like a common, naked criminal.
Violent Nudists! says:
In America, we can purchase a gun, walk outside with it, put it in a car, and drive to a firing range. In 1999, there were 1,609 gun-related deaths among 18- to 19-year-olds. Last time I checked, the number of people killed by looking at a nudist was somewhere between -- 1 and 0.
Being naked is funny to me- not especially sexy. If I see a naked (hot) woman it's usually beacause I'm looking at pornography and she is trying to look sexy (although I think this rarely works). It's much sexier when a woman does a little peek-a-boo a la Gypsy Rose Lee. And for men it's a whole different story...but I digress.

At the risk of being prosecuted for indecent exposure, people like to excercise naked, karaoke naked, and make snappy web sites about being naked. There is a great page of naked protesters and to my surprise, they are not all ugly, dirty hippies.
I guess I'm envious of these people's independant spirit. My family used to be pretty free-spirited when I was younger and we would walk around naked, but I do get creeped out by the community of family nudity. I mean, going to another families house for dinner and EVERYONE is naked? seeing your own dad without clothes is bad enough, but someone elses dad? gross.
Also I keep thinking about that Seinfeld episode- there is 'good' and 'bad' naked, for sure. And as far as I know from David Sedaris' account in his essay Naked, most nudists activities would fall in the category of 'bad' naked.

If you have any questions, refer to this insiprational page that uges you to "Reject the shame forced on you by the perverted minds of others"

OK. Now I've had more than enough naked for a while. I feel disgusting. I'm sorry. ugh.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Do the words: "Noted Fashion Photographer" mean anything to you?

WINCE! at Mr. and Mrs. J.
CRINGE! at Janice's new face peel

RECOIL! in disgust from Tyras hairstyles and "home-spun" wisdom

GAPE! at the "model's" childish behavior


SQUEAL! with delight over the prospect of beginning a brand-spanking new season of, as Jenipher so famously wrote on her ass:
ANTM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
respecito- or whatever

I've been illegally invited to a party hosted by Trace magazine for the upcoming fourth cycle of America's Next Top Model. Yaya herself will be there (the runner-up, but she still got signed by Ford) I won't go, because I don't think I will like the crowd, but if anyone is interested in crashing:

Tuesday, March 1st 2005 @ TAJ
48 W 21st street between 5th and 6th Avenue
7PM - 11PM
Wherever I am, I will be watching:"What the divas are up to now" that airs tonight on the UPN
The real fun is tomorrow night. I will be attending a catered party on the upper east side for the occasion.
I mean have you seen the artwork for this cycle? lovely...just lovely.I have to go read up on the new girls bios. I might start a pool. I wonder how to do that.

What happens when priests play game shows?

God fucks with them: This shit is funny- I promise. It's better than that lady on the Newlywed game show.

Anna is, a binge drinker. Anna is, a binge drinker naaoooooww

If you love NY- North York England that is- you shouldn't tell the papers about how much you drink. You are so daft! Shame on you Anna!

Riding the Snake

Thanks to my Nubbin for sending this my way. When I was in high school I was very much into The Doors and all things Morrison. Why does every suburban girl go through that weird Doors, Joplin thing? My BF Bou and I would listen to classic rock whenever we had boys over. I guess nothing puts you in the mood like overly cocky, drugged out wierdos. I think it was my junior year in college by the time I finally took that damn poster of the Lizard King off my wall. I gave it to Nubbin a few years after that, and I think with all the moving around apartments the last few years, old Jim ended up back in my closet. Rolled up, but not thrown out.